Matchmaking
by Kiterie
Summary: Genma tries to help set Kakashi up with Iruka... things don't exactly go as planned.


"I've gotta piss," Kakashi said, standing up and pushing away from the table.

Iruka made a face and shook his head. "I'm gonna... go get some fresh air. This smoke is making me dizzy."

Genma started to protest ,but neither man paid any attention, so sighed and took another drink of his beer. He didn't get it. He knew Kakashi liked Iruka; the way the silver-haired jounin watched the school teacher made that much obvious. So, why couldn't the moron get it through his thick skull not to act like an ass when he set it up so perfectly. Genma had tried to tell him the chunin wouldn't go for the lascivious sense of humor or the pointed looks, and that Kakashi could maybe refrain from reading Icha Icha while the brunette was around.

But, no, of course not. The first thing the jounin had done was pull out his book and start reading, aloud. And, after Genma had bribed people to get a table in the corner of the club that was relatively quiet. He'd thought that he could get the two men talking and then slip away so they could get to know each other better.

The dirty blond downed another shot and flipped the cup upside down on the tray. "Fucking crazy-assed perverted jounin." Okay, so he was one too, but that didn't change the fact.

--

All eyes riveted to the silver-haired man as he stalked into the bathroom. Even a civilian could feel the murderous intent rolling off the jounin, and one look at the man's face and the previously noisy bathroom rang with silence. The music wafting in from the room seemed overly loud as they stood there staring at him.

"Out." The word was spoken, and if not for the rather unsual silence, never would have been heard. The room magically cleared, as the crowd shuffled out, careful to step around the glaring copy-nin.

They didn't hang around outside the door, either. There were several other bathrooms. Likely, they were just as crowded as this one had been a moment ago, but the patrons all suddenly seemed to be of the opinion that lines weren't so bad.

--

Shoving people out of the way, a man, looking decidedly sick, shoved his way through the crowd towards the nearest restroom. People stepped aside, clearly not wanting to get between him and a toilet.

--

Genma whistled for the waiter, having finished off the round of shots. He took the tray and disappeared. He groaned and smacked his forehead against the top of the table. "Fucking Kakashi," he muttered.

Honestly, the man was completely socially inept! The tokubetsu wondered how a man that oblivious could even be ANBU. Maybe, he wondered, maybe it was deliberate. Could it be the sharingan user was afraid of rejection?

--

"Bastard." Two hands shoved the grinning jounin against the wall, an annoyed but amused look crossing the face of the chunin.

"I don't know what you mean, sensei." A kunai flew through the air and thudded into door frame, essentially locking the two men in the small room.

"Oh? Are you sure about?" Iruka asked, growling as he tugged the masked down to reveal the jounin's smile. "You're a terrible liar, without your mask on."

"Only where you're concerned, Koi." The silver-haired man smiled and pulled the other man against him. Both men were already hard, and the friction seemed to be a catalyst as hands slid over clothes, tugging shirts free.

Kakashi twisted Iruka around, pressing him agains the wall so he could attack the newly revealed chest. He trailed hungry kisses over the bronze skin, drawing moans from the chunin.

--

"Fucking hell, what is taking those two so long? I fuckin' hope they didn't bail on me. I'll kill Kakashi if he did." Genma groaned and slumped back in his seat.

--

--Edited for Content, IF old enough contact me for link to explicit version--

--

Iruka buried his face in the copy-nin's neck for a moment while he tried to steady himself. After a few minutes passed, he leaned back, smiling. "Think he knows?"

Kakashi laughed, and yanked a few paper towels free. "No. I bet he thinks we both abandoned him." He cleaned both himself and the tanned man, who's arms were still wrapped loosely around his neck.

"Should we tell him?" The chunin grinned up at his lover, both still flushed.

"It's much more entertaining to watch him fail so spectacularly at match making." Reluctantly, Kakashi pulled away and began getting dressed again.

"Well, it's really not fair. I mean, it's not his fault he doesn't know you got over your insecurities and asked me out years ago." Iruka pulled on his shirt and grinned at his boyfriend. "It's not like he's the only one who can't tell the difference between your love sick teasing and your, well, love sick teasing."

Kakashi wrapped his arms around his chunin again. "It's more fun this way." He planted a soft kiss on Iruka's lips. "Besides, if a village full of shinobi with a gossip ring to rival the daimyo's can't figure it out, then they need more practice."

Iruka smiled, rolling his eyes. "We can keep it secret until Naruto gets back. We should be the ones to tell him, after all. And, he'd kill us if Sakura found out first."

"I'll meet you back at the table then, love." Kakashi took a step back, winked, and disappeared in a swirl of smoke and leaves.

Chuckling softly to himself, Iruka pulled the kunai out of the door frame and slid back into the noisy, crowded depths of the club.

--

Genma glared drunkenly up at the copy nin as he appeared beside him. "Bastard."

"So I hear," he chuckled.

"Y' know I..." He blinked, thinking there was something he missed but couldn't bring himself to care. "I've decided... something." He paused again, trying to remember what it was he'd decided. "Oh yeah. I'm not wasting any more... more time try'n ta get your scrawny ass laid."

"What'd you say, Genma?" Kakashi asked, looking up from his book.

"Ah forget it, buy me another one of these... uh things..." He waved the bright pink drink at his friend.

"What happened to the vodka?"

"Cute waiter." The blond smirked and swirled his senbon in the glass before licking it.

"I'm sorry I took so long... Genma, are you okay?" Iruka asked as he sat down again.

"I'll take him home," Kakashi offered. "He gets lonely when his boyfriend is out on a mission without him. Don't you Gen-chan?" He laughed as the blond blinked at him.

"Do you need some help carrying him, Kakashi-san?"

Kakashi shook his head as Genma face planted on the table. "I'll be fine." He winked at Iruka and mouthed the words 'see you at home' before scooping his drunk friend up and disappearing in puff of smoke.

Iruka chuckled, downed the last of his drink, and slipped towards the door. He could take his time walking home since it would take Kakashi a while to get the tokubetsu tucked in.


End file.
